The Discipline Series: Life Without Discipline - Ever Been Overlooked (#5) Because of Poor Performance (#6)? PART 1

If this is your first read in the Discipline Series, you don't know the brief story on how this came to be. In a Tuesday night life class (that's what I call bible study), my pastor gave us 12 indicators that let us know we may be living a life without discipline. (Read the intro to this series.) The message wouldn't leave me alone because God has been speaking to me in my personal time with Him about discipline and walking in purpose and pushing past laziness and doing what He says regardless of how I feel or what's going on around me. And He told me to share with you in this blog series. The first indicator was Carnal Thinking/Desires. The second was We Defend Our Wrong Actions. The third was Our Health Suffers, and the fourth was We Make Financial Mistakes.

Today, I want to ask: Have you ever been overlooked for opportunities or advancement (indicator #5) because of your lack of discipline and/or poor performance (indicator #6)?

It may be hard to admit, but the truth is people get overlooked all the time for promotions, opportunities, advancement and their "big shot" because they lack discipline, which usually shows up with poor performance. Let me use my middle school dance classes as an example.

When my students were preparing to perform in the school's Christmas program this year, I was working them pretty hard in class every day. Each grade level (6th, 7th, and 8th) was set to perform one song each; they each had one shot to make a statement. The 6th graders were ready to go! All year they've been my hardest workers. They WANT TO shine in EVERYTHING they do in dance class. The 7th graders really liked their song for the Christmas program because it was a fun one. For once, I didn't have much static from them. But those 8th graders, the ones who are too mature to care, "fought" the Christmas program from the day I introduced their song until the day of the performance. The boys thought the choreography was too girly. The girls thought the combinations were too difficult. The music was too slow. The transitions were confusing. "And we'll be dancing barefoot?" they asked. Every complaint under the sun! It was a trying time with them. There were a few students, though, who knew that no matter what the choreography was like or how slow the music was or if they had on shoes or not, they had to make the grade, and they weren't about to let one performance mess that up. They worked hard EVERY class session, they didn't complain, they asked for help when they needed it, and they even asked for extra rehearsals. They weren't the best dancers, by far, but they gave 110%.

Three days before the performance, I announced that only three 8th grade students would be performing in the Christmas program. The class was shocked and a bit confused at first; they couldn't believe I wasn't making them participate, but I REFUSED to have a halfway performance from them. When I named the three students, they were excited. They had worked hard for it. The rest of the class erupted with a different excitement because they were relieved that they didn't have to do anything. I could literally feel the tension subside in the room. But then, the KICKER!

When I announced that those 3 students would also be receiving 2 test grades for their performance and an exemption from the final choreography assessment (the biggest one of the semester), everyone wanted to all of a sudden get their act together and perform. But, of course, it was too late. And like a good teacher whose goal is to teach a lesson in EVERYTHING, I stood my ground and watched them eat their complaints and squirm with embarrassment, disgust (with themselves), and regret.

See...it wasn't that they couldn't do it. In fact, they had proven many times in the weeks of preparation that they could out dance the 6th and 7th graders and make the 8th grade song the audience's favorite. (I love friendly competition with them.) After seeing themselves on video, they even agreed that they looked amazing, but the "I don't care" and "I'm too cute to perform in front of all those people" attitudes killed them. (What did they think dance class was for?) The BEST dancers missed an opportunity to be the best because they couldn't get over themselves. They let all of their good talent go unnoticed, and the not-so-good dancers jumped in and "took their prize".

Who took your prize?

Jesus had something to say about a matter similar to my classroom example. In the following passage, Jesus was talking to His disciples, explaining to them that no man knows the day or the hour of the end of the age. He told them to not let that be their concern. Instead, He said, be busy about the work of the kingdom. He gave them this example:

14 "Again, it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. 15 To one he gave five talents of money, to another two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. 16 The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. 17 So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. 18 But the man who had received the one talent went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master's money. 19 After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them. 20 The man who had received the five talents brought the other five. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with five talents. See, I have gained five more.' 21 His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. come and share your master's happiness!' 22 The man with the two talents also came. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with two talents; see, I have gained two more.' 23 His Master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!' 24 Then the man who had received the one talent came. 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. 25 So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.' 26 His master replied, 'You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? 27 Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest. 28 Take the talent from him and give it to the one who has the ten talents." (Matthew 25, NIV)

Jesus used this story as a way to explain to His disciples and today's disciples (Christians) that they should be using what He gave them (gifts, talents and abilities) to bring others into the kingdom. Like the man who had 5 talents, for example... Let's imagine that his five talents were teaching, building and creating, singing, budgeting and planning, and writing. The Master was pleased when He returned because the man had used his teaching to break down the truth of God's word to others; he used his ability to build and create to design a facility for the homeless in the community where they could shower, eat, sleep and attend classes to help prepare them for life off the streets; he sang in the choir that held weekend concerts at the homeless facility, and many of the homeless were so moved by the choir that they wanted to join to learn the songs of the Lord; he used his budgeting and planning skills to create an organization that would financially support 20 less fortunate children every year to attend a week-long Christian sports camp where they could hear the gospel and learn God's word; and he used his writing to write books that encouraged others to live lives that please God.  The Master was so pleased! So many people came to know Jesus as a result of the man using what The Master gave him. He made a return on The Master's investment in him.

And the same for the man who had two talents. He did a lot with his two talents and people's hearts were drawn to Jesus because of it. But the one who had one talent did nothing. He was like so many of us who have skills and natural giftings and do nothing with them for the kingdom. He "sat on the gift", and the Master was not pleased. The man was told to put his talents to work, but he didn't and the Master called Him a lazy and wicked servant. He completely overlooked the man and gave his talent to the man who had 10 talents because he knew he'd do something with them.

Think On This...
Are you like the man with the one talent? Has the Lord overlooked you for "promotion" or advancement because of your poor performance? Has he given attention to someone else with your same giftings and skill set because you haven't proven that you can produce?

We will continue tomorrow with being overlooked because of poor performance, but you have an assignment. You will need this assignment when you come to the blog tomorrow.

Assignment
On a sheet of paper or in the notes section on your phone, list the natural gifts you have. A natural gift is something you do well that, in most cases, you knew how to do without any training. Singing, for example, is one of those things that you're either born with, or you're not. That's an example of a natural gift. Most of us have multiple gifts. List as many as you can think of.

Iantha's List
singing
dancing
twirling (batons)
choreography
writing
editing
teaching
speaking
acting
organizing
budgeting and planning
encouraging

The Discipline Series: Life Without Discipline - #4 We Make Financial Mistakes

I grew up in a home where one of my parents was a money manager and the other was not. One parent saved money and operated (as much as possible) on a budget to make the most of what came into our home. The other parent was a free spending, impulse buyer who was concerned only with paying bills. After the bills were paid, the leftover money was for the spending. I saw the struggle that that caused. I heard the arguments. I witnessed the strain. The parent who was disciplined with money taught me the value of money and how to make the most of what I earned. And guess what? We never had one formal lesson; I learned it merely from watching. The other parent who wasn't disciplined with money taught me what NOT to do. Again, there was never a lesson or a talking to or any warning about how I would end up broke, but I knew from what I saw that that way wasn't THE way.

When I observed my disciplined parent, I saw thoughtfulness and careful planning in paying bills and in providing me with the things I needed for school and cheerleading and the millions of other things I had going on. Nothing was handed to me without that parent consulting the overall financial "plan" that was made for the money in our home. I remember, quite vividly, having to wait at least a day for just about everything I asked for if it meant there was gonna be some dipping into the family's money.

I took the lessons I learned from both parents into my own life and became a money manager very early in life. When I started making my own money as a junior in high school, I planned out what I would do with it. I didn't just spend it because I had it. I got paid every week, so each week I would make inventory of my needs and plan my money accordingly. If I had school activities or junior or senior class fees (I paid all of my senior year fees on my own), I would factor that in for the week as priority. If anything was left, I saved some of it and used the rest as spending money. I learned this from watching my disciplined parent. I didn't want to be frustrated with needing or wanting something and having no money to get it. I saw how miserable that was from watching the other parent. I refused to needlessly and carelessly squander away my "livelihood". (Like I was making real money! Them lil' $100 checks! Ha!)

That practice paid off. Later, in college, when I got an on-campus job to have extra money (school was completely paid for with grants and scholarships), my parents passed my car insurance and cell phone bills on to me. Those became my responsibility as soon as I started making my own money. Around that same time, I got wise counsel from another family member to get a small department store card to help build my credit. I was advised to shop there once a month and to pay off my balance within two months, if not the very next month. This would show creditors that I was responsible and set me up for the "big stuff" I'd be purchasing once I was on my own after graduation. So I had 3 bills, and I learned to budget with those 3 bills. I got paid once a month with that on-campus job, and I knew all I had to do in the month. I knew what needed to be paid, so I didn't spend wildly or make unnecessary purchases. And after my 3 little bills were paid, I was careful about what I purchased even then.

When I gave my life to the Lord my freshman year in college and began to study God's word, I learned that I was to be a good steward (manager) of EVERYTHING the Lord blessed me with because everything in my hands was to be used, in some way, either directly or indirectly, for kingdom purposes. My life was no longer my own. I was to be an example for Jesus Christ in EVERYTHING I did and my resources were placed in my hands to help me do that. If I was wasteful or careless with anything--my apartment, my car, my money--I would pretty much be wasting what God blessed me with, and I DEFINITELY didn't want to do that, so I stayed the course. I honestly didn't know any other way to be.

Then I got my first post-grad job and moved into an apartment with new bills, and it took me a few months to get on track. But when I did, naturally, I was on a roll because I was already disciplined in budgeting and planning. After a few months of being on a roll, though, I got comfortable. The money I had left to play with, I just started spending and spending. I was just buying stuff and eating out on a regular, and I wasn't saving a dime! I was gladly living from check to check, spending every penny from one check until I got the next. NO DISCIPLINE! But that was about to change REAL QUICK!  My car, the car I'd had since high school graduation was paid for. One Saturday, out of nowhere, a teenage driver came across a 4-lane highway and slammed into  the driver side of my car. It was totaled. I had to get a new car and that meant a new car note. I'd NEVER had a car note before because my parents had taken care of it since that car was my graduation/college gift. But now, on top of the bills I had, I was adding a car note, and when I tell you I ain't had NO MONEY after I paid bills...I ain't had NONE!

I remember being in quiet time with the Lord one day not long after I got the new car. He told me that that car note was my wake up call. He told me that I was being wasteful. I wasn't planning and budgeting like I had before and that I needed to learn to manage again, especially since there was so much that He'd placed me in my city to do. (I'd just moved to Augusta, GA. Had only been in the city about a year when the accident happened.) I was gonna have to be disciplined in my spending and in managing the affairs of my home because it was a direct mirror of the managing I would have to do with the ministry He was about to place in my hands, Praise Movement School of Dance. My money was so tight with that car note that it whipped me into shape quite nicely. LOL! That was a HAAARD season! I became VERY disciplined in my planning and in my spending. That spiritual whoopin' from the Lord DID NOT feel good!

I shared all of that to say this...
When we are not disciplined in our finances, it will show. We WILL make financial mistakes. We WILL make unnecessary purchases. We WILL buy things we don't need.

Do yourself a favor and begin operating from a monthly budget, if you don't already. Like, how can you NOT? How can you NOT track what's coming in and going out each month? I can't imagine it any other way. It's NECESSARY. Plan wisely. Consult your budget for things outside of your regular bills. If the budget says "NO", don't buy it. I live by the motto (because I learned the hard way): Tell yourself "no" today so you can say "yes" tomorrow. There is so much excitement and pleasurable accomplishment in delayed gratification. You don't HAVE TO have it (whatever
"it" is) RIGHT NOW. If you didn't plan WITHIN YOUR BUDGET to have it, you don't need it. Financial mistakes can HURT, and they can be lasting and follow you for years. Invest in your financial stability by applying a little bit of discipline.

Tomorrow
Poor Performance

The Discipline Series: Life Without Discipline - #3 Our Health Suffers

In this series, we're digging into 12 indicators that let us know our lives may be lacking discipline. The last 2 indicators have focused on a lack of spiritual discipline. Today, indicator 3 focuses on a lack of physical discipline, and one sure way to know we lack physical discipline is if we see our health suffering. Now, let me be clear before we jump in. There are some health issues that are hereditary, and others that may come upon us in ways that are beyond our control, but when our health suffers because we don't give necessary attention to our bodies, there's no doubt that we've dropped the ball in discipline.

                      

It's not difficult to spot a person who lives a physically disciplined life. Their discipline speaks in the way they look. The same is true for a person who lives a life without physical discipline. Their lack of discipline speaks too. I know I can certainly speak for myself here.

For years, I was dancing regularly at church, and when I say dancing, I don't mean standing up for a 4-minute song waving my hands and twirling around. I mean throwing DOWN with some high impact leaps, kicks, turns and charismatic dance phrases for however long the praise team would sing. My worship garments, all except the very top layer, would be soaking wet! And we didn't just dance one Sunday a month. We danced EVERY Sunday morning and at least once a week at rehearsal. On top of that, I was working out 2-3 times a week at the gym (mostly step aerobics). I lived a pretty active life, so I was in good shape, and I was pleased with the way I looked a felt. Then, out of nowhere, I began experiencing some lower back issues that caused me to have to slow down. Per the chiropractor, I needed to quit step aerobics completely because of the pounding that the stepping up and stepping down was giving my lower back, and I had to slow down and seriously modify the intensity of my worship at church. And I honestly didn't need the chiropractor to tell me that. My body was letting me know that I would have to make some changes in how I got exercise.

In November 2013, the Lord moved me from that church, so not only was I not working out like I used to at the gym, but I would no longer be dancing at church 2 times a week. For a little while, I did modified work outs at home and every now and then at the gym, but it wasn't long before I completely stopped. I sat for months, doing nothing and eating however much of whatever I wanted, and it showed. I looked at myself in the mirror in August 2015, and I knew I had to do something. I wasn't accustomed to being inactive, and I certainly wasn't accustomed to "filling in" my clothes. I didn't feel like myself AT ALL and my confidence was beginning to slip. I was always tired and drained; my energy was low. My performance at work with my students wasn't at its best either, and I was easily frustrated with just about everything they did or didn't do.

One day I saw on Facebook that some of my friends had attended a 2-hour boot camp with Veeta D's Fit Camp. From the pictures that were posted, I could tell they were really working, and I knew that's what I needed. I knew, too, that because I'd been away from consistent work outs for so long, I would need some accountability. I signed up IMMEDIATELY, and from August 2015 to February 2016, I worked out pretty much daily. And I wasn't just taking instruction from Veeta when I worked out. She TAUGHT US how to work out based on our individual needs. She TAUGHT US how to eat and how to measure our caloric intake so we wouldn't be working out in vain. I learned how to take care of me so when I was no longer with her and the Fit Fam, I'd know what to do, and I'm SO MUCH better after my experience there. My motivation was taken to a new level, and I knew that there could never be another time in my life where I didn't work out on a consistent basis. There just couldn't be!

I've seen both sides of the physical discipline coin. I've seen the benefits of disciplining my schedule, my body, and my mind (because physical discipline starts in the mind), and I've seen the consequences that come with not disciplining myself, and I don't ever want to fall on the "no discipline" side of the coin again!

So How Can One's Health Suffer?
I'm annoyed when people think that working out is just for physical appearance. I get asked all the time, "Iantha, why do you even work out? You're small, girl. You don't need to work out." Uuuum...YES! I do! Working out for me is more about being healthy than it is about looking good. I want both, but more than anything, I want to feel good. If my body isn't functioning like it should, what good am I for kingdom use? I can't minister like I should if I'm "sick and shut in."

Obesity (Poor Eating Habits)
You've probably heard that weight loss is 20% working out, and 80% what you eat. If you haven't heard that, just know that it's true! I also read somewhere that you can't outwork a bad diet, and I couldn't agree more. When I first started with Veeta, I wasn't counting calories or "tracking" my meals. I was used to eating what I wanted because I was so active, but when my level of activity changed, I knew I had to make some eating adjustments, and BOY what a difference it made! I literally saw change within a week. And I felt so much better because I wasn't heavy with food.

Obesity is real! When we carry extra weight, it causes all kinds of other health issues (below). If we are going to be disciplined in this area, it's going to mean studying up to know what's good to eat and what's not. Every food that tastes good to us isn't necessarily good for us. Once we know what's good and what isn't, we have to make a conscious decision to prepare and eat foods that help our bodies, and eat less of the ones that hurt us. Some foods we just have to completely rid ourselves of.

Diabetes
I'm no medical professional, but I know that diabetes is a killer. In my own family, diabetes has wiped out a couple people. I can remember one family member being particularly instructed by the doctor to refrain from eating certain foods. Rather than listening to the doctor in this matter of life or death, she indulged in those foods because "she couldn't help herself." And if you read yesterday's blog with indicator #2, Defending My Wrong Actions, you know that "I can't help myself" is a lie! She COULD help herself. She just lacked discipline, and it cost her life.

Self-Esteem / Confidence
No matter who you are or where you come from, one thing will always be true: When you look good, you feel good, and when you feel good, you ARE good. When you don't look good, you don't feel as good. My confidence was not at 100 when I was "filling in" my clothes. I was uncomfortable. I didn't walk with my head as high. I tried to find a way to cover up the "extra" that was there. And even though I didn't "get back" over night, just feeling better from my workouts made a difference in my confidence. (When we're not confident, other areas can be affected too.)

Heart Disease
Another killer. Extra weight and unhealthy foods put strain on our hearts (and other vital organs). Cardiovascular activity, alone, could change the condition of a weak heart, even if the pounds aren't shedding just yet. Power walking for 30 minutes a day could make the difference of a lifetime!

And these are just a few. So many diseases and disorders are related to excess weight and poor eating habits. Is your life worth the discipline it will take for you to get your health in line?

Lastly, what I found is when I'm physically disciplined in one area, I'm physically disciplined in other areas as a result.  I remember telling Veeta when I first started in August 2015 that there was NO WAY I was going to do 5 am work outs. When I started with her, I was doing evening classes. I decided one day that I was gonna do a 5 am just to try it out, and I fell in love! The way the energy from that morning workout set the tone for my day was unreal! I would get home from my workout and hit the ground running! I'd prepare a full breakfast (most days) and actually sit down and eat it instead of grabbing something while rushing out the door. While I was eating, I would read a book (if I was reading one at the time) and/or study God's word. After that I would actually make my bed! Ha! (That WAS NOT an everyday thing before those morning work outs.) I would then shower and prepare for work and get there well ahead of time instead of walking in right on time. And my productivity would be through the roof at work!

The benefits of discipline were (and are) BLESS-ING me!  There are areas where I have it together, and areas that need my attention, but having examples from what I KNOW works is all I need to get it right.

If your physical, mental and/or emotional health is suffering because you're not giving attention to your body, it's your lack of discipline that has you where you are.  When you choose to do something to get yourself on track, you'll see a difference. Trust me.

Tomorrow
Life Without Discipline: #4 We Make Financial Mistakes

Dear Jonathan McReynolds,

(Originally drafted September 25, 2015, but not posted for fear of looking like a groupie. Ha! I'm good now.)

Dear Jonathan,

Let me just start by saying, "Brother, you are the TRUUF!" I wanted to post pictures and video on Facebook from the CD release weekend in Chicago so people could see and share in the awesomeness, but I realized I had a lot more to say than could be covered with a mere post or two. And I needed to say it all to you.

Let me get the pleasantries out of the way since this is a letter. "Hey, hi, hello. How are you? Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I'm Iantha. *sticks out hand to shake yours* I'm a New Orleans native who lives in Georgia. I'm a middle school educator and founder of Praise Movement School of Dance. My life's work and the very beat of my heart is pouring into my students and my dancers. I love music. It lives in my bones. I know when I hear GoOD music, and I know when an artist is more than an artist. You, sir, are more than an artist who is making GoOD music. Thank you."

Okay. That's enough.

I remember when I first stumbled upon you. Because I'm always looking for music to use for ministry with Praise Movement, I keep my ear to the street. Ha! (A lil' gangsta wit' it!) I'm always searching for a fresh sound and a fresh message to keep my girls excited about dancing unto the Lord. And in my search about hmmmm...maybe a year or so ago now, there you were. It was No Gray. I was like, "Umph," nodding my head to the beat, making the stank face when you hit all them notes and runs, lifting my hands as I downloaded the message from the song into my internal database. Myyy, myyy... And like we all do nowadays, I had  to hear more from you, so I scoped you out on social media. I sat for a good bit on YouTube watching all of your Unplugged videos, and that was a wrap! I'd officially added a new artist to my repertoire. You were fresh and genuine. The lyrics came for a real place, and that, I LOVE! And on top of that, like India said to you on stage at the CD Release last weekend, you just "sing your face off!" Ha!

Of course, after that, I wanted an opportunity to see you live. The artists I love, I just HAVE TO see! When you were in Columbia, SC at Tye Tribbett's The Chosen conference, a friend and I took the short drive to see that amazing line up, but we were, unfortunately, with the great number of folk who couldn't get a ticket. Let me not revisit that memory. It's too painful. (I love me some Tye too!)

So fast forwarding to now...
THE VERY DAY that you announced your CD Release/B-Day Bash via social media, I contacted a friend and asked if she'd be down for a trip to Chi-Town because I  was immediately compelled to go. I should've mentioned in my lil' intro up there that I will hop on a plane in a minute for an adventure! Being able to see Jonathan McReynolds and his amazing line up AND do Chicago for the weekend? (singing) "Com-plete-ly yeee-ees! My sooo-oul says yeeees!"

We made arrangements THAT night...purchased our Gold Access tickets, booked flights (she from Dallas, and I from Augusta) and a hotel, and hashed out all the details. We were ready for our Jonathan McReynolds Girls' Weekend! (That sounds a little weird, but I already wrote it soooo...)

And that Friday night DID NOT disappoint! My GOD, my GOD!

Thank you, Sir, for teaching Christ and Him crucified. Thank you for, at the young age of 26, living a life that shouts Jesus. I'm 9 years your senior, but I remember when I was 25 laying the foundation for Praise Movement and how it seemed there were only a few (thank God for them) in my age bracket who were serious about not only living for God, but "living Him" so others could learn from how we live. We wanted to make disciples. We wanted to build the kingdom. Young adulthood gets it hard because so many are living lives outside of Christ and it would make it look like none of us are living for Him. So NOT true! I'm so grateful for your ministry. I'm grateful for the lives that will be changed from not only hearing you through your music, but from seeing how you live your life.

Thank you for sharing bits and pieces of your journey on stage that night. Thank you for letting the world know that you simply did what you felt God was telling you to do, and 5 years later...

Please continue to share it. Let others know through your testimony that souls await our obedience. Souls await our decision to walk in the gifts and callings He's placed in us.

And thank you for sharing your stage with other artists. It was an amazing night! I wanted to see Israel live too, so that was cool. And how dare Smokie sneak up in the building and get himself on that stage and kill for all of 2 minutes! *falls out*  It was just a great night of lifting Him up and honoring the man of God. Thank God you were born. And again, as India said, "We need you on the planet."

Oh, and Happy Birthday! I didn't say that when you signed my CD and so graciously agreed to stand to take a picture with me even though as you said, "now you know I'm tired. I been working."  Even that spoke volumes. Ha! And when I said I'd traveled from Georgia to be with y'all that night, the love of God and sincere gratefulness rose up in you and manifested itself with a hug.

I'll continue to pray that your love for God's people and your humble gratefulness remain. Certainly, "the world" you're in now can be a whirlwind, so I, and so many others, will stay on the wall and cover your humanity. We'll cover your health. We'll cover your gift. We'll cover your mind. We'll cover your discernment.

Lastly, we enjoyed the heck out of your beloved Chi-Town, okay?!?! Will DEFINITELY be back to finish exploring. One day was certainly not enough.  The nomad in me needs adequate time to see what I want to see and do what I want to do.

We love you! We're grateful for you! Keep living Christ! I look forward to the live recorded acoustic set! That CD is gon' be da BIDNISS! No pressure. Pun intended.

Iantha
#GeorgiaLove

The Discipline Series: Life Without Discipline - #2 Defending Our Wrong Actions

In a Tuesday night life class (that's what I call bible study), my pastor gave us 12 indicators that let us know we may be living a life without discipline. (Read the intro to this series.) The message wouldn't leave me alone because God has been speaking to me in my personal time with Him about discipline and walking in purpose and pushing past laziness and doing what He says regardless of how I feel or what's going on around me. And He told me to share with you in this blog series. Today we'll talk about the second indicator: Defending Our Wrong Actions. 

"I only curse when I'm real mad." 

"...but it was just a little lie." 

"God knows my heart."

"I don't even do it everyday. Just sometimes." 

"God gon' forgive me." 

"I just couldn't help myself."

"Well, if she wouldn't-a done it to me, I wouldn't-a done it to her."

Heard any of these? Said any of these, even if only in your heart?

These statements and so many others like them are clear signs that discipline, particularly spiritual discipline, is lacking in us. Show me someone who uses statements like these to defend or attempt to justify their actions, and I'll show you someone who is without the discipline they need to sustain a healthy relationship with the Lord.

Let's examine a few of the examples for a deeper understanding.

I only curse when I'm real mad.

No, you only curse when your flesh (your ways, not God's) dominates your spirit. I remember one of my pastors, years ago, teaching on building spiritual muscles. He gave the example of a man who owned 2 dogs. The owner wanted one dog so he could train it for dog competitions, and he wanted the other just to have as a pet. Because he wanted both of his dogs to live, he of course fed them both, but he wanted them to grow and develop in different ways, so he fed them differently. He fed the potential competition dog more regularly, and he fed it proteins and other foods it would need to bulk up. He was diligent in measuring the dog's food, and he made sure he didn't skip any meals for fear of lessening the dog's chances to win. His pet dog simply ate to survive and ate pretty much what was left after the competition dog's food was rationed out for each meal. It doesn't take a genius to know that the competition dog grew more because it ate more. It was inevitable that the dog with more time and attention given to its meals and nurturing would be the dog to dominate in size, strength and power, because as pastor said with the phrase that has stuck with me all these years, "Whatever we feed the most is what's gon' thrive." No truer words have ever been spoken!

If your spirit was being fed more than your flesh, your spirit would dominate. Your response when you're mad wouldn't be curse words. If your temperament was submitted to the Word of God on a consistent basis, your response would be one that reflected Christ. When we justify our curse words, or any other unwholesome speech (Ephesians 4:29) for that matter, we tell on ourselves. We tell that our spirits are not submitted to the Lord, but that we know they should be.

Read "Do You Love Jesus But Still Cuss A Little?"

I just couldn't help myself.

Yes, you could, actually. You always can when it comes to choosing to do what you know is right. Anytime you're given a choice, you can help yourself. Your doing is completely up to you.

For instance, when you know you shouldn't buy the shoes because the Lord is teaching you to manage your money so you can better the lives and livelihood of your family, but you buy them anyway and say, "I just couldn't help myself," you only lie to yourself. You could help yourself because God gave you self-control (discipline) and He gave you a choice. You simply wanted the shoes, and chose not to apply the self-control you were given.

"He kept looking at me with them eyes, and I just couldn't help myself." Yes, you could, actually. When he was looking at you and your eyes met his, you could have turned your eyes right on in the opposite direction and been on about your way, but you chose to look in his eyes and let things proceed from there, and every time you defend or justify your actions by saying you couldn't help yourself, you tell on yourself. You tell that your spirit isn't submitted to the Lord. He gave you self-control (discipline). You just chose not to use it.

Proverbs 25:28 (NIV) says, "Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control (discipline). Cities in bible days were surrounded by high walls. The walls were protection from the enemy's attacks. If the walls were broken down or penetrated in any way, the city and its inhabitants were vulnerable and WIDE OPEN for the enemy. EVERYTHING was at stake!

Are you that city? Are you WIDE OPEN for the enemy's attacks because you don't apply the self-control you were given?

God knows my heart.

You're right. He does. He knows that you want to do what He says, but when you don't, it says to Him that your flesh (your ways, not His) have more say in your life than He does. If His Spirit was dominating your heart, your actions would line up with His ways, but because your flesh dominates your heart, your actions reveal that. There's no way around this truth: Our actions reveal what's in our hearts. So whenever you do whatever it is you do, God DOES know your heart. You show him every time. Every time you defend or justify your actions by saying "God knows my heart," you pretty much spit in the Lord's face and tell him that you know what you should do, but that you're gonna do what you want to do anyway.

Are we getting the picture here? When His Spirit isn't dominating our flesh, His Spirit doesn't win. The flesh does. And when the flesh wins, and we know it shouldn't, we try to defend it and justify why what we did with our flesh was okay, knowing full well that it wasn't. There's a breakdown in our spiritual discipline when we do that, and quite frankly, we don't honor the Lord when we make excuses for why we just don't do what He says. So rather than trying to explain that away too, (It's not that I'm not disciplined, it's just that... OR I try to be disciplined but...), just submit your heart to the Lord and begin giving yourself to him in prayer and in consistent study of His word.

Tomorrow

Life Without Discipline: #3 Our Health Suffers

The Discipline Series: Life Without Discipline - #1 Carnal Thinking/Desires

In a Tuesday night life class (that's what I call bible study), my pastor gave us 12 indicators that let us know we may be living a life without discipline. (Read the intro to this series.) The message wouldn't leave me alone because God has been speaking to me in my personal time with Him about discipline and walking in purpose and pushing past laziness and doing what He says regardless of how I feel or what's going on around me. And He told me to share with you in this blog series. Shall we venture on to the first indicator: Carnal Thinking/Desires? Tiffany knows a thing or two about that.

Tiffany gave her life to the Lord her sophomore year in college, and she was on FIRE for the kingdom! Anyone who crossed her path knew she loved God, and it wasn't because of anything she'd say. In fact, she rarely said anything. It was evident in the way she lived. She had DEFINITELY been changed! Her closest friends couldn't even believe she was the same person. The Tiffany from freshman year was the first one to tear the club doors down on a Friday night and the last one to leave on Saturday morning...EVERY weekend! And she wouldn't be the last one to leave because she was having that much fun. She would be the last one to leave because she'd be THAT drunk. She would drink so much at the club that she would be unruly and throw fits of rage if her friends tried to drive her home before the party was over. She insisted on staying until the last person had walked out the door, even if that meant not leaving until 4 or 5 AM.

And who knows how many boyfriends she had freshman year? There were too many to count. No one could keep up with that part of Tiffany's life; she couldn't even do it! What her friends were able to count, though, were the 3 pregnancy scares she had. They could count the number of times she'd been written up for having a guy in her dorm room after hours. They were able to count how many classes she failed and how many scholarship dollars went flying out the window as a result. They could count all of that, and the numbers were alarming. She really was a downward spiral until a classmate invited her to a play that his church was doing at the Boys and Girls Club. That play changed Tiffany's life! She was captivated by the story. The lead female character, Destiny, and her classmate's character, Travis, were in a relationship. They were Christians who wanted to live their lives to please the Lord. They both knew that they shouldn't have sex before they were married, but Travis only knew it in his mind; he didn't know and believe it in his heart. Destiny would explain to Travis over and over that she had made a promise to God to save sex for marriage not just because she wanted to honor Him with her body, but because she wanted to honor Him with her LIFE! If she had sex, that would just be the act, but along with that, she would be giving up self-control. She would be breaking down the trust relationship that she has with God. She would ruin her witness to others who know that she follows Christ. She knew she would experience guilt because of the young ladies she mentors and who look up to her. Her commitment wasn't just to not have sex. There was so much more to it than just sex. Her commitment was to honor God in EVERYTHING! Travis wasn't at that place in his walk with the Lord. He knew, in theory, that it was wrong, but that was before he felt the feelings he felt for Tiffany. He'd never loved anyone like he loved her and he wanted to express it in his physical affection toward her. Tiffany told him that that was all the more reason to wait. "If you love me like that, as real and as deep as you say, then you wouldn't want me to dishonor my God. You would want me to stand firm in my convictions and live a life that pleases God and witnesses to others."

Tiffany couldn't believe what she was seeing! She had NEVER seen a man wait for sex. And at the end of the play when Travis asked for Destiny's hand in marriage, Tiffany couldn't hold back her tears. She couldn't explain what had happened in her heart either, but she knew something had changed. Before she could even gather herself, she was at the front of the auditorium standing with about 50 other college students as men and women prayed for them and explained to them what it meant to repent and give their hearts to God through Jesus Christ and His sacrifice. Tiffany and all the others were invited to the church the next day, and she knew she couldn't miss it. She went that Sunday, and she went every Sunday thereafter.

The church was awesome! It was the home away from home that she didn't even know she needed. The people there loved her in a way that she'd never experienced. They cared about her heart. They helped her sort through the mess in her life and clean it up. She was safe. She was covered. She was nurtured. And she was taught the Word of God and how to study it for herself. She was mentored and discipled and taught how to apply the Word of God to her life. She grew at an unbelievable pace, but there was no doubt that her growth was real.

Right around the one year celebration of her new life in Christ, things started to change a little. Since she'd given her life to Christ, Tiffany had been studying God's word with passion and talking to Him sometimes for hours in prayer, daily. As finals neared, though, and as she heard the cries from her friends saying she never hung out with them anymore, she slacked up a little. First, she just shaved some time off of her morning time with God so she could study more for finals. Eventually, she began skipping full days of time with God because she needed more time to study notes and read chapters and watch videos and whatever else she needed to do to pass her tests.

Then, because of all the studying, she needed "brain breaks". Throughout that past year, Tiffany spent a lot of time with her new friends from church. She found it so much more refreshing to be with people who wanted to please God than being with those who made her feel uncomfortable in her new skin. It never failed that when she was with those old friends, they'd try to get her to do things that she'd done before but was completely uncomfortable with doing now. She just wanted to be free of that strain and pressure. Her friends at church kept her grounded because everyone was walking the same path.

The weeks leading up to finals were different though. When her old friends called, she didn't turn them down. She was happy to have some relaxation. And boy did they help her relax! Tiffany hadn't had a drink in over a year, and although her mind was telling her that she shouldn't take the drink they offered, and even though she'd told them "NO" on about 5 or 6 different occasions since she'd been studying for finals, this night was different. Tiffany had heard her friends say over and over again, "Girl, Jesus turned water into wine, " and "You don't have to drink more than one glass. Just get enough to help you relax. That's all," and in her mind, that didn't sound too bad. She DID know that the bible said she shouldn't drink to drunkenness, so she told herself she'd only have one glass because she knew one glass wouldn't get her drunk.  But one glass led to another. And that glass led to another, and before the night was over, the old Tiffany was with her old friends, thinking like the old Tiffany and indulging in the old Tiffany ways.

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There was a breakdown in Tiffany's thinking. Her thinking and her desires became carnal. And her Carnal Thinking/Desires was a result of a breakdown in her discipline.

First things first...Carnal Thinking is any thinking that is contrary to the way God thinks. It's safe to say that God's word (The Bible) are His thoughts since all of the Bible is God-breathed (2 Timothy 3:16). God's word is God's way of thinking, and anything contrary to God's way of thinking, or God's word, is carnal.

We, Christ followers, can know, with all surety, that we're lacking discipline if we begin to think carnally and desire carnal things. If we "take on" the mind of Christ, our actions look like the mind of Christ. If we don't "take on" the mind of Christ, if even for a moment, our actions don't look like the mind of Christ. Let's examine the scriptures.

Romans 8 (NIV)
5 Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.  6 The mind governed by the flesh (carnal mind) is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. 7 The mind governed by the flesh (carnal mind) is hostile to God; it does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. 8 Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.

As long as Tiffany was feeding her spirit, giving it a daily serving of God's word, her mind was set on the Spirit and what He desires. She was able to tell her old friends "no".  She was able to turn away from everything she had been doing before that her flesh (carnal nature) desired. And she was able to be an example to others without even saying a word. She was feeding her spirit with His Spirit, so His Spirit is what others saw. We are what we eat. If it goes in, it's coming out. It's impossible to feed on anything and it not affect you with its likeness.

Now when Tiffany wasn't feeding on His Spirit, she didn't have any of His Spirit to display. Her mind was open game to be governed (ruled) by the flesh (carnal nature), and so it was. She'd gotten to a place where hanging out with old friends was uncomfortable, but when she wasn't reminded of that by His Spirit, her carnal thinking said hanging out with them would be okay. She desired it even. ("I just need to have someone(s) to relax with.") God knew that this wasn't a safe place for her because of what she'd come from with them. He was able to protect her as long as she was in communication with Him, but when she stepped away... When she loosened the grip on her discipline...

Tiffany knew drinking was no longer a part of her life. His Spirit confirmed that in her heart, and His word confirmed that in her mind, but when she stopped feeding on His Spirit and fell out of discipline, her carnal thinking kicked in. She thought, "I know I'll be okay if I just have one drink. I won't get drunk, and I'll be okay because God's word says don't drink to drunkenness. I won't get drunk."  When carnal thinking went in, carnal desires took root, and carnal behavior came out, and in the end, led to "death", like the scripture says it would.

It is our DUTY to lead disciplined lives in prayer and study of God's word. If we are to be led by His Spirit, we have to feed our spirits with His Spirit. Otherwise, we are overcome by the flesh (carnality), and carnality is what will show up in the way we rationalize that it's okay to pick up old habits, visit old places, engage in old activities, and run with old buddies. We are new creations in Christ. The old has gone; the new has come. Let not our minds be governed by that which is carnal. Let's discipline them to be governed by His Spirit.

Tomorrow
Life Without Discipline - #2 Defending Our Wrong Actions

The Discipline Series: Intro

Tuesday night life class (that's what I call bible study) at my church is ALWAYS good! I ALWAYS leave enlightened and refreshed. And there are some Tuesdays that just take me to a whole 'notha level. Last night was one of those nights. Maaaaan... I KNOW the Lord was talking DIRECTLY to me!

If someone took a look at my Facebook page and scrolled through the last month or so of my thoughts, they'd see post after post about discipline and walking in purpose and pushing past laziness and doing what the Lord tells you to do regardless of who (or what) tells you not to. It's been heavy on my heart because in my personal time, God has been reminding me of my need to push. He always reminds me that someone needs what I have, and that if I'm not disciplined in working to get it to them, I fail.

I fail me. I fail them. And ultimately, I fail Him.

He reminds me that He put too much in me for me not to get it out to those who need it. He reminds me that He CHOOSES to use me, and I realized that if He chooses to use me, He must already know that I can do whatever it is He's tasked me to do. So I need to suck it up, give up an hour or two of sleep, turn off the TV, say "no" to a couple invites and GET IT DONE! And THAT takes discipline!

Imagine my heart jumping out of my chest when my pastor stood before us and said his topic was "What About Discipline: When Discipline Meets Action". I was excited because it was confirmation that I was on the right track, but that excitement would soon share space with shame and conviction and a few "ouches" as the Lord used my pastor to step on my toes.

The lesson was on repeat in my head while I drove home. It stayed with me as I completed some evening tasks at home. It met me on my pillow when I settled down for bed. And when I woke this morning to study, it was there again. I heard the Lord tell me to blog the lesson in parts, and of course, because I'm such a good daughter (Ha!), I had to be disciplined and get it done. It was my first assignment after having heard the Word; I didn't want to fail. Writing a blog series takes discipline, and the thought of it excited me and scared me at the same time. Would I be able to do this with everything else I have going on? (We love to factor in what we got going on, don't we? Like God cares. Pssssh... *smacks teeth*) 

My pastor gave 12 indicators that let us know we're living a life without discipline, and in this series, this 14-day series, I'm going to share one of those indicators each day. On day 13, I'll share a few tips on how to live a disciplined life, and on day 14, I'll share some of the rewards of discipline.

Even in my overthinking about being able to commit to this 14-day series, I honestly couldn't wait to dig deeper and share because I hear so many believers talking about what they want to do and what they're going to do, but I don't see many actually doing it, and it breaks my heart! The ideas I hear coming from them are AMAZING kingdom-building ideas, but they're sitting on them. All I can think of is the host of people who are missing out on what God has for them because someone is thinking and planning and talking and strategizing but doing NOTHING. I hear their excuses for why they can't do what they know God has given them clear vision and instruction to do. I see them waste time doing other things. I watch them waste money on meaningless things when they could be using that money to plant seeds into their vision. And they can't even see that their own lack of discipline is what's holding them back.

Because I've been on both sides of discipline, I know the struggle, but I know that I struggled on the unproductive side of discipline because I wanted to. Period. As soon as I wanted to move in purpose, I did. I've watched myself miss opportunities simply because I wouldn't discipline myself to grab hold of them. I've wasted money on fast food because I've been too lazy to shop and/or cook. I've been late to work and other places because I didn't discipline myself to prepare ahead of time. And not only did I suffer, but those who depended on me "being there" suffered too.

But I've seen the other side of discipline. I've seen the side that's productive. I've walked through open doors right into positions and promotions because I PREPARED. I've seen how much easier my life can be when I buy and prep food and how much better I feel because I'm not eating junk. I've seen how much easier life is for me in the mornings when my clothes are laid out and ironed for the week. I KNOW the benefits of discipline, and I want to encourage you. Let's walk together for the next 2 weeks to hear what God has to say about discipline and pray together that you and I will both live more disciplined, productive lives.

I'll see you tomorrow for our first installment in the Discipline Series: Life Without Discipline- #1 Carnal Thinking.